Angus, Thongs and Perfect Snogging

September 11th, 2008 Film, Film Reviews, Xpress

Every five or ten years a director or studio figures we need another one of these movies, with a teen hero wallowing in being fat/unloved/no car/no girlfriend/ no boyfriend/pimples/divorcing parents. He or she will have their own language with friends and peers and spend at least some time talking directly to camera or providing a voiceover that serves as comical bullet points explaining their life and times.

There’s be a climatic event like graduation, an end of year dance or big party when they must finally fall into the arms of the object of their affection, and they’ll realise their parents and family — especially the annoying sibling or psychotic pet — are something to be loved and treasured instead of a source of embarrassment.

They’ll come to understand they’re beautiful and special and should ignore models in magazines despite starting out feeling like a revolting heifer or weedy nerd, and if we’re the age as the protagonists our faith in the future will be restored. If you’re any older you’ll roll your eyes and think back to The Breakfast Club, Ferris Bueller’s Day Off and a million others that have been done better.

This time, the hero is acerbic Georgia, an Eastbourne 14-year-old who goes through what must be every coming of age cliché since the time of Socrates, the abovementioned being mere a few.

Angus, Thongs and Perfect Snogging has some cute moments and laughs at the expense of some very well-worn devices (perpetually angry cat, hot new guy going out with school dolly bird, violent hockey match, etc, etc, etc.) It’s in the pursuit of said boy and the perfect snog that Georgia and her three best friends fill most of their days while they daydream, read magazine, spy on people, scheme, paint their nails and everything else a lifetime of Hollywood conditioning would have us believe teenagers spend all their spare time doing.

It’s cute, funny and attractive, but if you’re beyond school age don’t try to get too much out of it — nobody involved is talking to you.


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